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So, church camp was last week. To be honest, I didn’t wanna go very badly, or much at all. I thought I’d be so alone and bored and just wouldn’t get much out of it. But boy was I wrong. Last year I went to camp right after probably one of the saddest times I’ve ever had, so of course I wanted the message to just heal my broken heart and body. And that’s what’s amazing: last year the speaker was pretty terrible, but I was totally rejuvenated by the end of the week. And this year, I went into it with a kind of ridiculous “I don’t need help attitude” kinda, but the speaker was incredible! And He woke me up from my false reality, and I realized that I’ve only been living for myself and for good times with friends. The one that I always count on and love with evrything I am was taking a back seat in social situations, which is incredibly selfish of me, to keep Him from others. So basically, by reflecting on the past two camp years, I realize that no matter the band or the speaker or the people there or the activities or anything, God is the one who works, and He always will, no matter what we think or do. I really can’t reflect very well on the events or anything; it was all such a blur. But God works, and I know he’s all I wanna live for and I want it to show on my face and in my words and actions. My constant prayers now are going to be for aid in keeping on His path and for situations to spread Him like fire. The greatest fire EVAR. : D Mmmm idk what else to say, and I hope it all makes sense. <3
P.S. One night during worship, before we sang some sang which I cannot recall, Justin Cofield just made us all close our eyes while he painted a picture in our heads of some of the most amazing, wonderful things in this world. Then he’d say something to the effect that God created it all and rules over it all and it just hit me so hard. I sensed God probably the most ever in my life in that moment, while trying to imagine the depth of His utter majesty. Tears of joy welled up in my eyes as we did this, and I fell in love again. I’ll never stop falling for you, God, because you’ve been there even when I’ve question your very existence. I love you with all my heart, and more.
